Open Discussion: What subject should be added to high school curriculums?

Photo by Gisela Giardino

Our schools could use several subjects in the curriculum,  such as, oh cooking classes! ^_^ I was lucky enough to be in a school where such a class was offered, and wow… It’s incredibly useful! (Everybody eats, ya know.)

However, if I could pick only one subject to add, that would be self-defense.

A good self-defense class teaches you more than fighting. It teaches you how to handle less-than-ideal situations, like getting a flat tire on the highway. It also teaches you to be aware of your surroundings and what to look for.

This is another class I was blessed to take, but it was in my junior year of college. We only spent 2 weeks on “combat,” and the rest was on boosting self confidence and learning the other things I mentioned. ^_^ In one class we took time to just yell. Why? Because most of the students (myself included) had never yelled before.

It was the best class I took in both my high school & college career. My only regret is that I didn’t take it sooner. And I REALLY wish it was available to high school students. It’s easy to teach kids to be afraid of the world. It takes more time and effort to teach them how to take control of their lives. But I think it’s worth it. ^_^

How about you? What subject do you think should be added to high schools?

 

Open Discussions really ARE open for discussion! You can talk about whatever you want! The question is just to spark your imagination. ^_^

Open Discussion: What word best sums up your life thus far?

 Photo by Magnus Wrenninge

I was scrolling through the pictures at Thought Questions, and my brain had an instant answer for this one. ^_^ Apparently, the single word that best sums up my life so far, is….

Unexpected.

Life is full of surprises, and I know that when I was a teen, I NEVER would have imagined where I’d be now. Most of it’s good, some of it’s bad, but a huge friggen’ chunk of my life is just completely unexpected. I kinda like that. ^_^

Off topic: I got my red wiggler worms today!! Hubs already built the vermicomposter (aka, worm bin) a few days ago, so tonight we got the bedding (shredded cardboard & newspaper) together and made the worms all comfy. ^_^ Their first meal is some left over corn and a few diced tomatoes. I’m so excited!!!!

 

Open Discussion topics really ARE open for discussion! The question is just to spark your imagination, but you really can talk about whatever you want. Even worms. ^_^

Open Discussion: What’s the number one reason your best friend is your best friend?

 Photo by Anirudh Koul

I like this one!

I’d say that my best friend (Eddie) is my best friend because he knows me better than anyone else, and still accepts me completely.  I think that’s pretty damn awesome. ^_^

How about you? If you currently don’t have a best friend, what’s a must-have attribute that best friends need?

 

Open Discussion topics really ARE open for discussion! You can talk about whatever you want in here. The question is just to spark your imagination!

Open Discussion: What is the #1 solution to healing the world?

 Photo by Stephen Thomas

Alright, people! Let’s figure out the solution to fix all the problems in the world! *Cracks a whip*

I think one of the biggest problems is that we tend to see people with different beliefs and societies as non-human. They are “other.” And I think that we do this because it makes war a heck of a lot easier. I’m not a soldier (so take this with a truckload of salt) but I imagine it would be harder to kill someone if you recognized that they have a family and a life, just like you.

However, by dehumanizing our opponents we’re essentially saying that they’re not as important as we are. Now I know that many people can (and do) feel compassion for all creatures, but a HUGE portion of people lack empathy.

As a painfully recent example, take a look at the reactions to what’s happening in Japan. Many, many people have publically said on Facebook and Twitter that Japan is getting what it deserved, because of the whole Pearl Harbor thing. (They’re forgetting the two nuclear bombs the USA dropped on Japan afterwards, but that’s just a tiny detail. </sarcasm>)

I’m sure they’d feel quite differently if it was their city that was destroyed, or their friends and family who were missing. But because they don’t see the Japanese people as being like “them,” there is no empathy.

To wrap things up, I’d like to share a dream that I had many years ago. I think it encapsulates some of what I’m trying to say here. (This is taken almost verbatim from my dream journal, btw.)

I was standing in front of a massive sheet of light yellow paper. The paper was so big i couldn't see the edges of it. An old man was using it as his canvas, painting a landscape. I looked closely at a painted tree and I saw leaves swirling as if blown by the wind, and glittering with hints of gold.

As I investigated his painting, he grabbed a large round brush and dabbed three splotches of blue on an empty space. As I watched, the splotches changed colors and shape. Then the painter spoke up.

 

"A man died yesterday."

I was shocked, but kept watching the splotches of blue. As I watched them stretch into multi-colored clouds, I said, "I'm sorry. Was it anyone you knew?"

The painter paused for a moment, then said, "We lived under the same sky. And in that, we were brothers."

That’s was the entire dream, and I hope I never forget it.

 

So, what do you think is the #1 solution to healing the world? ^_^

 

Open Discussion posts really ARE open for discussion! You can talk about whatever you want. The question is just to spark your synapses.

Open Discussion: What could society do without?

 Photo by Spreng Ben

Oh heavens… There’s a LOT that we could do without. But part of me would love to see a world without automobiles. Can you imagine it? Gasoline would still be needed for boats and planes, but the air in the cities would be sooooo much cleaner. (Random factoid: I once had a temp job where I dressed up as Lady Liberty and waved at passing cars. Roads STINK!)

In my dream world I imagine that we wouldn’t have as many paved roads either, and there’d be more trees and parks left standing.

It’s an interesting thought. ^_^ What do you think we could do without?

 

Open Discussion posts really ARE open for discussion! You can talk about whatever you want. Really! The question is just to spark your imagination.

Open Discussion: Who was the last person you said “I love you” to?

 Photo by Gisela Giardino

Considering that I’m writing this post in advance, I have to guess on this one. Odds are that the last person I said “I love you” to was my hubby. We say “I love you” to each other probably 20+ times a day. *^_^*

Otherwise it was possibly my cats, friends, or whoever I just got off the phone with. What can I say? I’m a lovey person. ^_^

 

Open Discussion threads really ARE open for discussion! You can talk about whatever you want in here. The question is just to spark conversation!

Open Discussion: What do you want to be known for?

 Photo by Edgar Barany

I actually talked about this one a few weeks ago with my mom. ^_^ My conclusion was that if there’s only one thing I’ll be remembered for, I want it to be that I loved and accepted people for who they are.

Sure, it’d be nice to be a great blogger too. But love, now THAT’S important!

 

Open Discussion threads really ARE open for discussion. You can talk about whatever you want! The question is just to spark conversation.

Open Discussion: What are you an expert at?

Photo by R’eves

I thought it was time for a potentially ego-boosting question. ^_^ And now I have NO idea how to answer this one!

There are things that I’m good at, but I don’t know if I’d really define myself as an expert at anything. Hmm….

*Ponders*

I asked hubs for his opinion, and I’m afraid that I can’t post his suggestion. *^_^* But he did point out that I’m pretty good at bread making now. There’s one recipe in particular that I’ve been making for several years and I’d say I’m an expert on it.

Yummy!!

I took that pic over two years ago, so the loaves look even better now. (Size is hard to tell, but those were 17 inches long.) They’re tasty!!

 

Update: Here is the recipe!

Ingredients:

• 5c bread flour (give or take)
• 1 Tbsp sugar
• 1 Tbsp salt
• 5 tsp active yeast (2 packets)
• 2c hot water (should feel like a hot bath)
• olive oil
• cornmeal
• egg white
• water

1. Add the sugar, salt, yeast, and 2c of the flour into a bowl. Mix.

2. Add the hot water. Stir until thoroughly mixed. It’ll be very gloopy.

3. Stir in the remaining flour 1/2c at a time. When the dough pulls away from the sides it’s ready to knead. It’ll look shaggy and messy. ^_^

IMPORTANT: If you can only get 4c of flour into the dough, that’s fine! You don’t have to force it, and having too much flour will create a very dense and dry bread.

4. Sprinkle counter with flour and turn out dough. Knead. (If you’ve never kneaded bread before, check YouTube for videos on how to do it. It’s easy!) You can tell when you’ve kneaded long enough by pushing your finger into the dough. If the impression remains, you’re good. If it immediately fills in then you have more work to do. ^_^ The dough should still feel slightly sticky when you’re done.

5. Pour a little bit of olive oil into a clean bowl. Shape the dough into a rough ball, and add it to the bowl. Flip the dough so that it’s covered with oil, and rub the oily dough up the sides of the bowl too. Cover the bowl with a warm, damp cloth and let rise for 40-60 minutes or until it’s doubled in size.

Tip: A longer rise generally means a better flavor.

6. Turn the dough out onto a clean surface. Gently press it out, working from the middle to the edges. Fold 1/3rd of the dough inward, and then fold the other 1/3rd inward too. (Think of it like folding a letter.) Press the dough out some more. Grab 1/3rd of the dough and fold it inward again. Take the remaining 1/3rd and repeat. Smush it together and you’ll have a rough square of dough!

What does this do? This is actually how you’re “supposed” to punch down dough. The purpose of punching dough is to remove the excess air bubbles.

7. Divide the dough into 2 pieces. Take one piece and roll out into a rectangle. Starting with the long side, roll inward. (Think of a jelly roll, but without the jelly.) Pinch the remaining edge of dough to the roll. This creates a “seam.” Pinch and tuck the ends of the roll. Repeat with the 2nd piece of dough.

8. Sprinkle cornmeal on a cookie sheet, and place the loaves on it. Cover with a warm, damp cloth for 20 minutes.

9. Preheat oven to 375.

10. Take the egg white and add a few Tbsps of water. Mix thoroughly. Paint the loaves with the eggwash. Next, with a VERY sharp knife, make 3 cuts across each loaf.

11. Bake the loaves for 20 minutes. Remove from the oven and paint with eggwash again. Turn the pan and put it back in the oven to bake for another 10-15 minutes, or until the loaves are a rich brown.

12. Let cool (yeah right) and devour accordingly!

 

This is a pretty versatile recipe. ^_^ You can also shape it into 6 balls to create bread bowls instead of loaves. Making 4 smaller loaves (instead of 2 giant ones) is a great size for sub sandwiches.

To reheat, wrap the bread in foil and warm in a 375 degree oven for about 10 minutes.

 

Open Discussion posts really ARE open for discussion. You can talk about whatever you want! The topic question is just to spark conversation. ^_^

Open Discussion: What is your favorite time of the year?

Whoops! I got caught up with family b’day celebrations and totally forgot to get this post ready! *^_^*

Photo by Dawn

I’m going to interpret that as favorite season, but you can pick whatever you want. ^_^

My favorite season, hands down, is Spring. I love the hesitant (yet bright) shade of green that creeps over the trees. The air is still cool, but there are hints of warmth in the wind. Then the flowers start blooming, and the world feels wondrously bright and new. Everything has so much potential!

After months of grey skies and leafless plants, I welcome the Spring with open arms. Get here already!

 

Open Discussion posts really ARE open for discussion. You can talk about whatever you want! The question is just to spark ideas and conversation. ^_^

Open Discussion: What is one opportunity you believe you missed out on when you were younger.

Photo by Grazie Dayyero

I don’t really like admitting this, but for the first 16-18 years of my life I was pretty close minded. And I think I probably missed out on getting to know a lot of awesome people because I wrote them off as being “bad” people that I shouldn’t hang around.

As for the few “bad” people that I did hang around, my intent was to save them from themselves. Not necessarily a bad thing, but my focus wasn’t on really listening to them.

About two years ago I lamented to an online friend about my youthful blindness. She shared a quote with me that I’ve really taken to heart.

I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better. ~ Maya Angelou

I can’t change the past. But I can learn from it, and keep working to accept people as they are and not as what I want them to be.

 

Open discussion posts really ARE open for discussion. You can talk about whatever you want! The question is just to spark conversation. ^_^

Open Discussion: What do you like most about your job? What do you dislike most about your job?

Photo by Michael Ade

Ooooh! This one is a twofer! Sneaky.

For all intents and purposes, blogging is my job. I just don’t get paid very much. *^_^* I keep doing it because I love helping others. It absolutely makes my day when someone says, “I stopped by your blog and it was really helpful! Thanks!”

Seriously, I float on cloud 10 for the rest of the day!

What do I dislike the most? That would be the constant effort at trying to build a steady readership. Free2WinGames is coming up on its 1 year anniversary, but traffic has stayed the same for probably 5 months now. That gets discouraging. :(

Whoops! Didn’t mean to leave you on a downer. *^_^* Umm… umm….

Look! A trio of Fennec foxes!

OMG!!! *Cuteness explosion*

There. Much better! ^_^

 

Open discussion posts really ARE open for discussion! You can talk about whatever you want. The question is just to spark conversation!

Open Discussion: What is your favorite sound?

Photo by Paul Sapiano

My favorite sound is the wind blowing through trees. It’s best in the spring, when the leaves are soft and the air is warm. ^_^

Well, that was an easy one! What’s your favorite sound?

 

Open discussion posts really ARE open for discussion! You can talk about whatever you want! The question is just to help spark conversation.

Open Discussion: If I gave you $1000 and told you that you had to spend it today, what would you buy?

I love reading these questions on Thought Questions. ^_^

Photo by Gnerk

I’m going to add another clause to the question, and say that if you’re going to donate it to charity, be specific about which one and why you’d pick that one.

As for me, well, I’m going to be hypothetically selfish. (It’s hypothetical money anyway!)

I’d start by getting a 12 month Soapy Club subscription by Flowing Botanicals. It’s $100 and seems like it would be a lot of fun. ^_^

Next I’d swing by PetSmart and stock up on World’s Best Cat Litter for our cats and Bil-Jac dog food for my in-laws’ dogs. That could easily reach $300 right there.

Hmmm… $600 left.. Well, I could use some new clothes, so we’ll say $100 for 2 pairs of jeans and 2-3 shirts. (I keep my wardrobe small.)

Oooh!! I have books on crocheting and knitting, but the nice yarn is always far too expensive for me. This would be the PERFECT time to visit the local yarn store! Woot! I’d probably put the cap on $200 for yarn though.

The remaining $300 I’d spend on Ebay. I’d look for out-of-print hardcover editions of Girl Genius, and I’d probably buy a few gemstone specimens too. I haven’t purchased any stones in over a year! *Withdrawl*

So uh, that’s how I’d spend $1000 in one day. I thought my answers would be awesome and entertaining, but it seems I can’t fully escape my practical nature. *^_^*

 

Open discussion topics really ARE open for discussion. You can talk about anything you want! The question is just to spark conversation.

Open Discussion – What’s the best advice you have ever received?

 photo by Borko Dinus (AWESOME name!)

This one is easy for me. ^_^ A beloved aunt once told me, “Love your parents, but live your own life.”

To be honest, I’m not sure what we were discussing. (Maybe boys?) But I’ve never forgotten those words. I’ve always had ideas and opinions that conflicted (to a degree) with my parents. This was the first time I realized it was okay to have different ideas!

That epiphany was on par with the later one of, I don’t have to have kids if I don’t want to?!  Yeah, that one really was an earth shaker for me. *^_^*

How about you? What’s the best advice you’ve ever received?

 

Open Discussion threads really ARE open! You can talk about whatever you want. ^_^ Heck, even if all you want to do is talk about what you did for the holidays, I’d love to hear it! *Hugs*

Open Discussion – Whose life have you had the greatest impact on?

 photo by Mark Gommel

I’m really curious whether any of you can answer this one. I know I can’t! *^_^* It’s not that I don’t think I’ve had an impact on anyone, it’s just that I believe we can’t see the depth of our impact on the world. Many, many things that seem insignificant often turn out to be life changing events.

Want an example? Okay, I can do that. ^_^

When I was a Junior in college, my roomie introduced me to a game called Neopets. It’s a kids’ game, but they have guilds where people can talk and hang out. I was part of one guild that split, and I joined the new guild. I became close friends with the guild leader, who happened to live in Hawaii. (So in other words, we never met in person.)

In my Senior year I was having relationship issues </understatement> and my guild-leader-friend introduced me to one of her friends on Neopets. Well, this guy and I started talking, and he seemed pretty awesome. ^_^ After a lot more talking, we realized that we were only about a 30 minute drive apart.

We met, hit it off, and eventually got married!

If any part of that chain hadn’t occurred, then I probably would have never met my now-husband. And I can guarantee you that when my college roommate asked me to try Neopets, she never thought I’d get a husband out of it. ^_^

So, whose life have I had the greatest impact on? Absolutely no freakin’ idea. How ‘bout you?

 

Open Discussion threads really ARE open for discussion. You can talk about anything that you want! The topic is just to give you some ideas to get started.

Open Discussion – When you meet someone for the very first time, what do you want them to think about you?

 picture by dhammza

Hmmm… I want them to think that I’m nice, interesting, funny, charming… So, basically I want them to think I’m awesome. ^_^

Unfortunately, I’m very shy and quiet when I meet new people! (Online is much, much easier.)

Dangit! Now I want to know what people think about me. Hmph.

 

Open Discussions really are OPEN! You can talk about anything you want in here. The topic is just to give you some ideas. ^_^

Open Discussion – What has fear of failure stopped you from doing?

This week’s topic is a heavier one. But I think it’s a question worth asking ourselves.

 picture by Luca Rossato

Fear of failure is an ever-present mountain that I’m always struggling to climb. If I tried to list every thing I didn’t try because I was afraid to fail, well, we’d be here all week. *^_^*

But a few years ago I realized something. Failure is important. We learn so much by screwing up and making mistakes! Maybe it’s a small lesson, like learning that clothes left in the washer will become mildewy and stinky. Or maybe it’s a much harder one, like learning to be compassionate. (Those lessons tend to hurt, as we usually only feel compassion *after* we’ve experienced the same pain.)

Failure is an unkind tutor, but whether we heed the lesson or not is up to us.

That’s what I tell myself, at least. *^_^* It’s still REALLY hard to be bold and take risks. I would much rather succeed, please!

 

Open Discussions really ARE open! You can talk about whatever you want in here. The topic is just to give you some ideas.

Open Discussion Nov 28th – Dec 4th

Hope you all had a great holiday! My brain is still in slow-mode. *^_^* But there’s a lot going on this week, so I’d better wake up!

It may seem strange, but Monday (tomorrow) starts the first December week in Points4Prizes!  Yeah yeah, technically it’s a November date, but the rest of the week is pretty much December. Go with it. ^_^

I don’t have any thought provoking questions for open discussion this week. Aww! Don’t look so sad! I want to share a song with you instead.

In general, I’m not a fan of Katy Perry. Most of her songs fall into the “trashy” category for me. However, recently she released an absolutely beautiful song called Firework and I LOVE it! From what I understand, it was written in support of the “It Gets Better” campaign to encourage kids that life really does get better. And honestly, I think that’s a message that pretty much everyone needs to hear now and again.

Lyrics are posted below the video. I would love to hear some of your favorite songs too. ^_^

 

Lyrics for Firework

Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?
Drifting through the wind, wanting to start again?
Do you ever feel, feel so paper thin?
Like a house of cards, one blow from caving in?

Do you ever feel already buried deep?
Six feet under screams but no one seems to hear a thing.
Do you know that there's still a chance for you
'Cause there's a spark in you?

You just gotta ignite the light, and let it shine.
Just own the night like the 4th of July.

'Cause baby, you're a firework!
Come on, show 'em what you're worth.
Make 'em go, “Oh! Oh! Oh!”
As you shoot across the sky!

Baby, you're a firework!
Come on, let your colors burst.
Make 'em go, “Oh! Oh! Oh!”
You're gonna leave 'em falling down.

You don't have to feel like a waste of space.
You're original, cannot be replaced.
If you only knew what the future holds
After a hurricane comes a rainbow.

Maybe your reason why all the doors are closed,
So you could open one that leads you to the perfect road.
Like a lightning bolt, your heart will blow.
And when it's time you'll know.

You just gotta ignite the light and let it shine.
Just own the night like the 4th of July.

'Cause baby, you're a firework!
Come on, show 'em what you're worth.
Make 'em go, “Oh! Oh! Oh!”
As you shoot across the sky!

Baby, you're a firework!
Come on, let your colors burst.
Make 'em go, “Oh! Oh! Oh!”
You're gonna leave 'em falling down.

Boom, boom, boom.
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon.
It's always been inside of you, you, you.
And now it's time to let it through.

'Cause baby, you're a firework!
Come on, show 'em what you're worth.
Make 'em go, “Oh! Oh! Oh!”
As you shoot across the sky!

Baby, you're a firework!
Come on, let your colors burst.
Make 'em go, “Oh! Oh! Oh!”
You're gonna leave 'em falling down.

Boom, boom, boom,
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon.
Boom, boom, boom,
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon.

 

Open discussions are really OPEN! Share whatever you like! ^_^

Open Discussion: Nov 21st-27th

photo by Piulet

Lots of things made me smile this week!

1. I took the Spot the Fake Smiles test and found myself smiling at many of the videos. ^_^ It’s amazing how infectious a genuine smile is!

2. My kitties make me smile at least a dozen times a day. Yes, they can be annoying, but I feel such joy when one is curled up in my lap, all sleepy and warm. ^_^

3. I found an awesome little jewelry store called TinyHands. The creator makes teeny tiny food items that can go on jewelry or bookmarks. Oh, and the food items are scented! I’m getting some great ideas for holiday gifts. ^_^

4. I got to talk to my wonderful friends on Twitter and Facebook. You guys always make me smile! XD

 

How about you? What made you smile this week?

Open discussion threads really are OPEN. You can post whatever you want! The question is just to spark discussion.

Open Discussion: Nov 14th-20th

It’s a new week at Free2WinGames! ^_^ I hope you’re having an awesome time with Points4Prizes. New bonuses and a list of last week’s winners will go up tomorrow, but until then, here’s the new Open Discussion thread for the week.

You can post whatever you want! Did you recently see an awesome movie? Find a new book or recipe that’s too good to keep to yourself? Or maybe you just had a mellow week lounging around with your pets. ^_^ Share whatever is on your mind!

But if you can’t think of anything at all, you can tackle this week’s question from Thought Questions.

photo by IDL Photo

If you can’t see the picture, it asks, “What’s the best decision you’ve ever made?” I picked this question because I already have an answer for it. ^_^

[Trigger warning for food & body image issues]

If you follow me on twitter at all, you may have heard me say this already.

Short answer: The best decision I ever made was to get rid of my bathroom scale.

Long answer: I don’t remember how old I was when my parents put a scale in the laundry room, but I do remember stepping on it every day once it was there. I knew how much my mom and my sisters weighed too, and I constantly compared myself to them.

I would tell myself, “I’m not fat as long as I’m weigh less than ___ pounds,” but I didn’t really believe it. The numbers on the scale were higher than my older sister’s numbers, so I must be fat!

In high school I started dieting. A close friend told me she lost 50 lbs by drinking Dr. Pepper for breakfast and eating nothing until dinner. I envied her dedication.

When I got to college I was a little freer for a while and I gained some weight. So, my sophomore year I purchased a scale to keep in my dorm room, and I weighed myself several times a day. If the number went down even a little bit I’d be ecstatic. If it went up (even a tenth of a pound) I’d get depressed.

Near the end of my college years I had a LOT of stress going on and I gained more weight. A lot more. When I pulled out my trusty scale I was horrified and sank further into depression. Eventually I moved to a new city and basically hid from the world. I didn’t want to commit the grave offense of being fat in public! After a while I decided to “get serious” about weight loss, mainly because I was afraid of getting type 2 diabetes from being fat.

I made spreadsheets to track my food intake and my weight. I measured and weighed everything that I ate. And yes, the weight came off. My ego soared as the compliments rained in. I was hungry, but I was beautiful! With my new burst of confidence I crawled out of reclusion and pursued various jobs. Things were looking up!

I had been on a fairly extreme diet, and as I neared my goal weight I started tapering off and resumed a “normal” diet. The weight kept coming off! I reached my goal weight and kept on going. Some new friends told me that was awesome, and wasn’t it great that my metabolism had finally kicked in? I smiled and spread the same joyous lie to anyone who would listen. Yay metabolism! At that point I could eat anything I wanted and not worry about it!

Except I did worry about it, because I was still losing weight.

In time I crossed the threshold of “Wow! You look great!” into “Wow.. Um… You’re really skinny.”  I got bruises just from sitting on the toilet because there wasn’t anything to cushion my bones! Even my boyfriend commented that I looked anorexic. By that point I was consuming at least 3000 calories every day, and I still lost weight.

I started to get weak.

Finally, one night I couldn’t ignore it anymore. I felt nauseous and barely had the strength to stand. It was late, so my boyfriend took me to the ER.

The next few hours were really hazy, but I remember a doctor leaning over me and saying, “You have diabetes.” All I could think of was, “But I lost weight so I wouldn’t get diabetes!”

After learning that yes, I really had Type 1 diabetes, despite the complete absence of it in my family history, I spent a few days in the hospital. Once I was back home and on insulin, the weight started coming back. And no, I wasn’t eating 3000 calories a day anymore. It was mostly veggies, a little bread, a little meat, and some fruit. :P

At first I was glad that I was gaining weight. ^_^ But as the number went higher than my “ideal,” I started to get depressed again. I actually went 9 months without seeing my doctor because I was so embarrassed about the weight I’d gained! (Diabetics are supposed to go every 3 months.)

Eventually I stopped gaining weight, but by that point I was exactly where I was before I started the “serious” diet, and I was fighting some major depression.

Then one day I realized something. I realized that I defined my self worth by the number on that damn scale. If I weighed more than what I *thought* I should weigh, well then I was just a shitty person. But if I weighed less than this magical number, WOW! That means I’m awesome!

I pulled this thought process out of my head, looked at it, and decided that was a stupid way to live. I am a fat woman, but I’m an amazing fat woman. ^_^ It took a long, long time to accept my body as being wonderful as it is, but ditching the scale was the first step in the right direction. When I get weighed at the doctor’s office I don’t look at the scale and I ask them not to tell me the number. I haven’t had a number to obsess over for 2 years now, and it’s liberating!

If you’re ready to tell me all the health perils of being fat, I encourage you to visit this site and read a while. (Especially check out the Obesity Paradox links in the sidebar.) The author provides links to all of the research so you can see the proof for yourself. You’ll be surprised!

But no matter what, I’d rather be fat and happy than fat and miserable. When I look in the mirror I see a beautiful, wonderful person. I feel good about myself!

Now, you might be wondering why I don’t post pictures if I think I’m so awesome. ^_^ Well, here’s the hard truth: I have followed several blogs of openly fat women, and there is a disturbing theme. All of them, at one point or another, have shared some of the vicious comments and emails that they’ve received about their weight. It’s ugly. Whatever you’re imagining, make it 100x worse and you might be close to it.

Although I’d love to be a paragon of self-love and acceptance, I also have to face reality. If I put my pictures up, I will be insulted. It might be some random kid who has nothing better to do, or it might be an adult who I’ve ticked off, but it will still happen. I know my history of depression is in the past, but a big reason why it’s not in the present is because I’ve learned what I can and can’t handle. Most days I can handle insults just fine, but I’m not always brimming with confidence and optimism. To protect myself from attack on days where I’m not as strong, I keep my photos offline.

I didn’t mean to share so much, but I also really wanted to share. *^_^* What you might think is just an insignificant change may turn out to be the first step in a long, but worthwhile journey. I know I never imagined that getting rid of the scale would change my life so dramatically!

So, how about you? What’s the best decision you’ve ever made?